Bookshelf Report

I love to read.  But it hasn't always been that way.  I enjoyed books alright while I was growing up, but I wasn't usually the kid who hid a flashlight and the lasted story by my bed to read at night.  In high school and college, I disliked my literature classes because they told me what I had to read and when to read it.  Where's the enjoyment in that?

A couple years ago with determination to become more cultured and well-read, my roommate and I came up with a reading list of 50 books, mostly classic novels with a few other things thrown in there.  While she valiantly read the 50 books in a year, I didn't quite make it through the list.  Actually, I did terribly. I started well and went strong for a couple months, but I got stuck on Gone with the Wind (which I did end up finishing) then Three Cups of Tea (which I did not end up finishing).  From there I deviated from the list and just read whatever I felt like, lacking much discipline at all.  

All that to say, I like to read now though it has been inconsistent at best.  And though I have failed on the finishing-a-book-list front, I have been reaching the back cover of several books lately.  I do a lot better without a here's-what-you-have-to-read expectations.  Here are a few of my recents reads:

The Hobbit by J. R. R. Tolkien

We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures.  Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things!  Make you late for dinner! I can't think what anybody sees in them.

I tried to find one; but warriors are busy fighting one another in distant lands, and in this neighbourhood heroes are scarce, or simply not to be found.

I read this one because I wanted to see the movie already knowing the story.  I'm very glad I did because I was able to actually enjoy the film (instead of falling asleep like I have for ALL of the Lord of the Rings Trilogy.  I have yet to see one of them in their entirety.  Maybe reading the books first would help.).   Though I don't usually pick fantasy books, I do enjoy getting caught up in a good story, and The Hobbit was just that. 

Crazy Love by Francis Chan

Something mysterious, even supernatural must happen in order for genuine love for God to grow in our hearts.  The Holy Spirit has to move in our lives.

You do not need to preach to your pastor or congregation; you simply need to live out in your daily life the love and obedience that God has asked of you.

I read this one with my accountability partner.  She and I like to read different books or do different studies together, so this was the one we finished up right before Christmas.  We were challenged by it and appreciated Chan's perspective.  It is a big part of what inspired this post last fall, and the principles of it continue to challenge my mindset on a daily basis.

Radical Womanhood: Feminine Faith in a Feminist World by Carolyn McCulley

To live according to biblical principles today requires women to be bold enough to stand against philosophies and strongholds that seek to undermine God's Word and his authority.

Our brains confirm what Scripture tells us: men and women are equal in essence but are created to function differently.

I picked this one up at the Desiring God conference I attended last September.  Carolyn McCulley was one of the speakers, and I was curious to know more about her ministry.  She's also written Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye? Trusting God with a Hope Deferred, but I decided not to get that one since I feel like I been overloaded by singleness books and kinda over that as a book-topic.  

I enjoyed Radical Womanhood because it addresses our culture in light of the recent waves of feminism and how our thinking can be subconsciously impacted by this mindset without even being aware of how we have strayed away from God's perfect plan for women and how we should relate to men.  Definitely an interesting read.

So there are a few of my recent reads!  I'm in the middle of a couple more now and have a pile waiting to be read.  But that doesn't stop me from wanting to find more that I'd like to read!  I just got a kindle, so I'm sure I'll be filling it up with books waiting to be read. (Aside: My jury's still out on the e-reader, but I'm giving it a go.  I think my challenge will be paying money for a book that I don't get to hold in my hands or put my book stamp in.  I'll have to get over that, me thinks.) 

What are some of your favorite reads?  Any recommendations for me?  

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Travel Map

The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page. – St. Augustine

I have a little bit of wanderlust in me.  It's my dad's fault.  We grew up in the Philippines, often traveling to different places on the weekends.  While we were on furlough in the States, we traveled all over visiting the churches that supported our family's ministry.  It was always an adventure, not matter what went wrong or came up unexpectedly.  I grew up in the back seat of a minivan, enamored by the experiences of seeing new places and people.  

So, now I'm a grown-up who still likes to hop in the car to go somewhere for the weekend, often on a whim.  I would love to visit as many places as I can...some of which are reflected on this list I shared before.  There are a few things I would add to that list, but I can share those another day.  

Today I felt the need to literally (observe my correct use of this word) map out my progress on the "Visit all 50 states" item on my list.  

Here it is.  I felt like it was going to be more filled in than that, but when I actually got these places down, I realized how many states I have yet to check out!
   

States Visited: 21
States to Go: 29

For the record: Hawaii would be yellow.  Alaska would be white.

What's your favorite state to visit?  Any recommendations on things to do in the states I have yet to see?

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Let's Hear it for the Boy(s)!

Note: I am writing this post while sipping tea from my "I only date superheroes" mug. Just thought that would be good to throw out there.  Now on to the real thing!

The other day I was talking to my mom about a lady she knows who had been married for twenty-something years, had grown children, and whose husband was moving out. Sad. Seriously sad. I don't know this lady, her children, or her husband, but my heart was genuinely sad for her. I simply cannot imagine sharing years and years of my life with someone only to have him give up on us when the children grow up and move away, or when he decides that there may be something better out there, or when fighting for me and for us isn't worth it anymore.

And then my mom said something for which I am so, so thankful but rarely say out loud: "It just makes me so thankful for Dad and how blessed I am." (I can't remember her exact wording, but this is a pretty accurate paraphrase.) And she's right. Our family has been abundantly blessed by the consistency and leadership my dad has provided for 30+ years. We Finches are not without our quirks, but if nothing else, we can say we have always had a great example of godliness in our home.

This conversation with my mom reminded me of a verse I wrote in my journal a few weeks ago:

Many a man proclaims his own steadfast love, but a faithful man who can find? Proverbs 20:6

When I read that, I immediately thought, "Well, I am blessed to know many faithful men!" First there's my dad, and my brother, then the wonderful men my good friends have chosen to marry. There are also my own guy friends, and men from my church. These men are faithful to the Lord, their families (those who have them), their jobs, their friends, and their local church bodies. They are even faithful to me in some ways (if I ever need something that I can't or would rather not take care of as a single lady, I can call one of them to help me out, and they are ready and willing to lend a hand).

I often read about how there is a shortage of good, Christian men in churches and in families and how many men are failing to lead or initiate properly (and I think to some extent, this is true), but reading this verse made me abundantly grateful for the guys I know who don't fall into the traps of passivity or unfaithfulness.

Though I don't yet know who my faithful man will be, I am so, so thankful for the other faithful men in my life. And, for the record, I think they are real-life superheroes. They may not be able to fly or have laser vision, but they play a part in saving the world from impending doom, fighting for what is good and honoring to the Lord despite the world around them tempting them to take the easy way out.

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2013 - More than Enough

In the spirit of new years posts...here's mine.  

I don't like to make resolutions.  I do, however, like the new-start feeling that comes along with starting a new calendar.  Also, I like to have some kind of theme for the year.  Nothing too crazy, but some sort of catch phrase or the like to guide my mindset for the next twelve months.  This was my theme from last year.  Maybe I'll do a reflection post on how that went for me.

Over the past couple weeks, I have been praying about what this year's theme (or whatever you want to call it) would be.  Without the A-HA! moment I was hoping for, I've settled on this:  More than Enough.

The theme is twofold.  

First is the issue of contentment in Christ.  He is more than enough for me.  I think of Chris Tomlin's song "Enough":

All of you is more than enough for all of me, For every thirst and every need. You satisfy me with your love, And all I have in you is more than enough.

Every longing and desire I have should ultimately be met in Christ.  He may use other people or things in the process, but in him I should find my satisfaction and wholeness and completeness and contentment.  I am created to need him to be whole, and he can fill that need in my life.  So this year, in the midst of whatever longings or desires in which I find myself, I need to turn to Christ because he is more than enough to meet my needs.  

Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us... Ephesians 3:20

Second is the issue of excess.  I'm not sure why this is so much at the forefront of my mind lately, but it is.  I have more than I need in most areas of my life.  More clothes than I need.  More shoes than I need.  More mugs than I need.  More pillows than I need. More you-name-it than I need.  

I have so much stuff.  I like to call myself a keeper instead of something crazy like a hoarder, but seriously.  So. much. stuff.  The issue is that I become sentimentally attached to things because of the memories attached to them.  For example, I don't want to get rid of that shirt I never wear anymore because so-and-so gave it to me or because I wore it this one time to this one place and if I get rid of it, I'll never remember that thing with the guy at the place (Ocean's Eleven reference, anyone?).  And I need to fight that.  I am not called to cram my house with stuff so that I can remember or feel comfortable or fulfilled or proud.  I am called to generosity and simplicity so that I am not distracted by comfort or convenience or even memories at the expense of my life bringing glory to the Lord.

I've started fighting this fight.  I have gone through my closet, taken pictures of things I want to remember instead of keeping them forever, and become much more acutely aware of my stuff.  But I still have a long way to go, and this year, I want to be consistently reminded of this battle.  Because it's not so much a battle against having too many pairs of shoes as much as it is a battle in my heart not to value things as an idol.  I may want a bigger, beautiful house that can more easily fit all my stuff and has a dining room so I can use placemats, but that is not as important as me trusting the Lord to provide for my needs and seeing my things as tools with which I can bless others.  He has given me more than enough to meet my needs, so I need to turn around and give to others instead of keeping things for myself for whatever silly reason I can think of.

And he said to his disciples, "Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat nor about your body, what you will put on. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothing.  Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse or barn, and yet God feeds them.  Of how much more value are you than the birds! [...] And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried.  For all the  nations of the world seek these things, and your Father knows you need them.  Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things will be added to you. [...] For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.  Luke 12: 22-24, 29-31, 34

So there you have it, folks!  2013 - More than Enough

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All the Single Ladies

(Two things before I get started.  1.  This is not just for single ladies.  Single gentlemen might appreciate this, too, though I apologize in advance for my female perspective.  Sorry, it's all I've got.  2. It's long.  I'm sorry.  I kind of got to rambling.  But it's all good stuff, me thinks.  Ok, here we go.)

I recently listened to a podcast that was hosting an interview with Steve DeWitt, a pastor in Indiana.  His unique story of being a pastor (a senior pastor at that) and single until he recently tied the knot at age 44 gives him a platform to discuss singleness and ministry on a level that most can't share.  Just before he got married, he gave a sermon titled The Bachelor Pastor that touches on some important points of singleness that really resonated with me.  I encourage you to listen to/read his story and be encouraged by it.  Here are my thoughts on some things he said.

Having been single (in an I'm-not-married way) all my life and single (in an I'm-not-dating-anyone way) for the last six years, I could relate to a lot of thing things DeWitt said and experienced.  He wanted to get married and was verbal about it.  I tend to be that way, too.  He was consistently having people ask him about why he's still single.  I get that a lot.  And by a lot I mean a lot more than a lot.  (I have yet to come up with a really good reason...) He perhaps overvalued marriage in his life.  I think I do that far more that I should.  

While marriage will be a blessing that I will prayerfully get to experience someday, more often than not too much weight is placed on marriage as a precursor to "real life" or "being a grown up" or the like.  And I'm to blame for that as much as anyone.  In the grand scheme of life, what is most important? Living for the glory of the Lord.  Is marriage required for that?  No.  DeWitt said "We tend to celebrate the gift of marriage more than we celebrate the gift of singleness."  He makes good points about weddings and anniversaries being super exciting and sweet celebrations (and they should be), but there is a significant disparate when it comes to parties for those of us who have not yet tied the knot.  (Thinking about this makes we want to throw an I'm-still-single party.  Do you think people will still bring presents?)  "The Bible does not look down on singleness," notes DeWitt.  I think that's good for me to remember because sometimes it seems like the church does.  

All that to say, we tend to focus on the blessing of marriage, but not on the blessing of singleness.  And yes, I actually believe singleness is, and should be, a blessing.  Don't ask me on a day when all I see on facebook are people getting engaged and I've just watched the sappiest chick flick in my library, but most days, I do see my singleness as a gift.  [Disclaimer to any future boo of mine who might be reading this:  I do see my singleness as a gift, but I will so look forward to different gifts that come with dating/marriage and will welcome them with open arms.  And hugs.  Hugs require open arms, too.  The gifts of singleness are just different than the gifts of non-singleness, so I'm just trying to enjoy and be thankful for what I've got while I've got it.  I do not value these things over being with you, but I am trying not to value being with you over these things.]  Because I'm single, I have more opportunities to be flexible with my schedule and when I travel and how I spend my money.  Because I'm single, I can more easily serve in ministry (both at my church and otherwise).  Because I'm single, I don't have to shave my legs as often (sorry for any dudes reading this, but it's true, and it's a perk).  If I had gotten married fresh out of college like I expected I would, the last few years of my life would look drastically different, and I have loved the last few years and would be sad to miss out on the memories I've made.

Then there's the whole spiritual side of things.  I think marriage is certainly a great opportunity for men and women to glorify the Lord in that specific context.  Selflessness, unconditional love, you know, all those good things.  But marriage is temporary.  It's a fleeting institution in light of eternity.  It only exists in this world and not in the world to come.  Yes, it's important here and should be a beautiful picture of Christ's love for the church.  It's a means of having the most intimate of human relationships.  But it's scope of impact doesn't last beyond this life.  My relationship with the Lord and the fruitfulness of my ministry should have zero correlation with my marital status.  Though a marriage would certainly impact my ministry and change it in many ways (and these changes will be met with open arms, as I previously mentioned, you may recall), I alone am responsible for how I invest the resources that I have been given and my personal commitment to Christ.  Yes, a marriage will have a significant impact on these things, especially being the woman who will have to submit to the leadership of a husband, but I cannot expect my husband to do the heavy lifting of MY spiritual walk.  

But I'm so lonely sometimes!  And won't marriage fix that?  (I'm not proud to admit I think this sometimes.)  DeWitt asserts, "God never intended marriage or singleness to be the sources of our contentment."  I've often heard that some of the loneliest people are married.  (And I believe that can be true. As a single person, I don't expect there to be anyone holding my hand through things.  I go it alone, and it can be a lonely road.  But I cannot imagine the loneliness of having a person who SHOULD be going through something with me but still feeling alone.)  But it's hard to internalize as a single chick.  I would expect that having a husband would be awesome.  Someone's always there to take the garbage out and watch a movie with (ok - let's be honest...and be a pillow for me while he watches a movie) and pray with me in the morning and all the other nice things I imagine could come with marriage.  These may be realistic expectations, but they may not be.  And I am always the one responsible for how I feel or for how I respond to a situation like loneliness.  My contentment depends on me and my Jesus.  Not me and my hubster (or lack thereof).

So where do I do go from here?  I just been mulling over these things in my head for the past couple weeks or so and rambling on this blog for the past couple paragraphs or so, but now what?  DeWitt doesn't leave this part out of his message.  He says, "Be the kind of Christian man or woman that a godly Christian man or woman would find attractive: a life that is lived to the love of God."  I can do that.  I can depend on Jesus for my contentment.  I can invest in my relationship with Christ (which hopefully my future Mr. will totally dig).  I can spend my time in a way that brings glory to the Lord.  I can work to weed out sinful areas of my life like pride and selfishness.  I can learn patience as I wait on God's timing for my main man to make his grand appearance.  After all, "There's nothing more annoying in all the world than whiney, single Christians," knowingly notes DeWitt.  

So if the Bachelor Pastor can wait until he's 44 to marry his leading lady, my 25 year old self can continue to love on Jesus until the time he brings that special someone into my life (or until the time he comes again or calls me home, to get all churchy).   I can keep living my life not in a waiting-for-it-to-start kind of way but in an I'm-already-living-to-the-fullest kind of way.   I can serve the Lord with my singleness while I've got it.  I can pray hopefully and expectantly for the Lord to bless me with a wonderful Mr.  At the end of the day, I may be a single lady, but I don't have to be a miserable, lonely, bored, and single lady!

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