Wednesday, September 05, 2012

I'm bad at this.

As much as I hate to admit it, I'm bad at this.  Blogging, that is.  I neglect this poor thing for weeks at a time.  I feel like every post has to be some sort of literary genius packed into a few words.  I always want to have something profound to say, but the truth is, I don't.  I don't always have a great insight into life, love, and everything in between.  I'm self-admittedly bad at this.  

And, as was aforementioned, I hate to admit it.  I'm a perfectionist.  A frustrated perfectionist, if I'm honest, but still a perfectionist.  I always want things to be just right.  And, well, most of the time, they're just not.  (Hence the frustration.)  So I have set a goal for myself: not to be perfect.  Just to be.  This applies to everything, not just by blatant neglect of this blog for purposes of not wanting to encounter my imperfection.  How this should look:  writing more frequent posts, even if they're not long enough, profound enough, witty enough, insightful enough, or inspiring enough.  Sending more cards, even if they're not on time, the card doesn't perfectly illustrate the event or my relationship with the recipient, or it doesn't have the prettiest lettering I've ever done.  Calling friends more, even if I don't always have at least 15 minutes to chat, don't have a really funny anecdote to share, or can't remember exactly what was going on in their life the last time we talked.  Being a better friend in general, even if I don't always know the right thing to say, forget their favorite color, or miss their birthday.  Pouring myself into my ministry, even if I don't have a life-changing breakthrough about how it will change lives, don't always feel like I'm doing any good, or struggle to know what is the biggest priority or what to do next.  And then some.

There.  It's out.  I'm not perfect.  (I'm sure you're about as shocked as I am.)  But if I keep holding out for perfect, I'm going to be holding out a long time.  I don't want to miss out on something really, really great just because it's not perfect. 

(Also, just so you know, this post is filled with fragments, and I know it.  And I'm not going to change it.  It's not perfect.  Boom.)

1 comment:

  1. Kristi - I really liked your post! I read it yesterday and then read this today and it goes along well with this idea.

    Grace - we need it one day at a time!